HB: Ewwe! Your gross don’t kiss me! I know what you did last night. Daddy-o found it.
SPAL: What? (His face flushes).
HB: You actually ate the evidence. (He shudders). You’re nasty and a bad boy. I’m the good boy! I’m the good boy! You’re not. (He dances in a circle).
HB: Well, when daddy-o came home last night he went up stairs like he usually does.
HB: So he yells down to mummsy, “I think Sir Poops-A-Lot pooed on our bathroom floor again but someone ate it. I certainly didn’t do it. I’d rather smell mummsy’s shoes.
SPAL: Doesn’t mean I ate it. (He gives a smug look)
HB: Mummsy told you to get away from her last night,too, because your breath smelled like poop. Poop breath! Poop breath! You’re going to get your mouth scrubbed out everyday this week. Hahahah!
SPAL: Can’t proove it!
HB: Already did, pansy. For one, I never poo in the house. And, I have nothing to hide and I would never eat poo. (Sniffs at SPAL) Yup. You still smell like poop breath. Mummsy’s going to dunk you in the Great White Watery Abyss of Torture everyday to scrub your dirty mouth. Hahahaha!