It’s not fair pansy-boy is getting better stuff than me. It’s not fair! It’s not fair! He’s getting all kinds of special things. Mummsy carries him everywhere in the house. He’s even got a special place on the sofa now and I’m not allowed to head butt him off anymore.
It’s not fair he gets a special water bottle on his house door.
He even gets his breakfast served to him in bed.
He even wears something called a diaper now. I want to wear one. It’s so not fair.
It’s not fair he’s getting all this special attention. I want to be carried all around the house. I want a special spot on the sofa. I want my food delivered to my bed. What’s the deal?
SPAL: Actually stupid, it’s rather humiliating to wear a diaper. I’ll be glad to share. As for all this special attention, it’s nice up until I do my poops and pees into the diaper-thing. Mummsy now puts me in the Great White Watery Abyss of Torture twice a day now. She says she doesn’t want me to smell like a toilet.
HB: But it’s still not fair!
SPAL: Nope. Life’s not fair. Get used to it kid. I never thought I’d end up like this. I’m totally dependent on mummsy right now.
HB: I want to be sick! I want to be sick! We could be sick together.
SPAL: ***shakes his head*** Being sick isn’t what it’s all cracked up to be, but it is nice being treated like royalty. I’ll be glad when I don’t have to wear diapers anymore. I hope the neurologist will be able to fix my legs.
HB: Me, too. Then I can head butt you off the sofa again.