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Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Sir Poops and Hair Ball: Interview with Honey Bear

0328111238-00 SPAL: Hello, nice people. Sorry we’re late again today, but Mummsy had errands to run most the day. She really hates doing them because they get in the way of her writing time.

HB: Well, I offered to do them for her, but she said no. Although, I’m pretty sure I could handle her car. I know where the key goes. 0328111236-01

SPAL: Mummsy says your too short and that you’d never be able to see over the steering wheel, stupid.

HB: Am not, pansy.

SPAL: Are,too.

HB: Whatever. I’ve got a big friend coming, and I bet she can drive because she’s way bigger than you.

SPAL: So.

HB: Yeah. Well. Here she comes, pansy. Bet she can beat your butt, too.

HB2: Hi, I’m Honey Bear. The picture below is of my nephew and me. I’m the beautiful ginger-colored one.

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HB: Can you drive a car?

HB2: Um…***scratches behind her ear*** A car? No. Although I’m quite smart, I don’t write, either. My mom would have a fit if I messed with her computer.

HB: Awe man! I was hoping we could go for a spin in my Mummsy’s Jetta.

SPAL: ***smirks at Hair Ball and then looks to Honey Bear*** You sure are big. What kind of fur-peep are you?

HB2: I’m a golden retriever.

HB: Wow! Do you fetch gold nuggets or something? I like to fetch my ball. ***sniffs at her*** You smell different…***sniffs again*** …you don’t smell like Fiona or Penny.

SPAL: ***cups Hair Balls ear and whispers*** Stupid. ***then looks to Honey Bear*** So who is your proud parent?

HB2:My parents are Joyce and Mitchell.

SPAL: Do either of them write, draw, or paint?

HB2: My mom writes a blog called Catch My Words and has published a story in Appleseeds Magazine. Dad writes legal contracts all the time.

SPAL: ***elbows Hair Ball*** Think you need to be careful. I think her Dad is a lawyer or something.

HB:***blinks his eyes twice***What’s a lawyer?

SPAL: Someone who could help take all your treats and your ball away from you if you’re naughty. So if I were, I wouldn’t hump Honey Bear’s hump or sniff her leg anymore.

HB: ***Gasps and moves away from Honey Bear**** OH. ***He looks to Honey Bear*** Do you like hanging out with your parents while they work on their projects?

HB2: Where ever they go, I shall follow.

SPAL: Yeah. We love to follow our Mummsy. Where do you like to sit when they’re around?

HB2: I always lay at Mom and Dad’s feet.

HB: Feet are tasty. Speaking of tasty, what do you and they like to nosh on? And would you be willing to share?

HB2: I’ll eat anything they give me, although I have all kinds of allergies so my parents don’t give me much. Share? Are you serious? If I shared, I wouldn’t have as much and that would be sad.

SPAL: Awe. I have lots of allergies, too. Mostly to commercial dog foods. I have to eat very special.

HB: Yeah. He’s a pansy. And seriously…you need to share! Or I’ll----

SPAL: ***whispers to Hair Ball***What? Did you forget her Dad’s a lawyer? She doesn’t have to share anything with you, stupid, except slapping you with harassment.

27 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. She looks like my dad's dog, Buddy.

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  2. Thank you for interviewing Honey Bear. She's so excited to be featured here. If you ever need help, Honey Bear is a good teacher. When we tried to get Milly to sit, she put her paw on Milly's booty to help.

    http://joycelansky.blogspot.com/2013/06/wordless-wednesday-haircuts.html

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We had lots of fun doing the interview even thought Hair Ball is quite stupid.

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  3. Funny! Does she fetch golden nuggets though?

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    Replies
    1. Honey Bear loves to play fetch. A tennis ball is good enough for this low maintenance gal.

      http://joycelansky.blogspot.com/2013/06/wordless-wednesday-teachers-pay-teachers.html

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  4. As always, very (cute) Good interview, guys. I think Honey Bear could probably beat his butt. We had a golden once. Love them.

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    Replies
    1. Hair Ball needs someone to beat his butt.

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  5. I've always liked retrievers! Funny interview, all of you!

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  6. Why don't these two have their own radio or TV show ?

    woof, The Square Ones
    cheers, parsnip

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  7. Sir Wills: Thank you.

    Angry: That would be interesting.

    Norma: Isn't she.

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  8. Greetings to Honey Bear, Sir Poops and of course, Hair Ball,

    I'm under instructions to type what Penny, yes Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet superstar, is dictating to me. A dictator dog or what.

    This was one golden interview with several nuggets of interesting info. Penny is most impressed with this interview. "Okay Penny, I shall press "Pawblish".

    Penny's human,

    Gary

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  9. Awww, sorry about your food allergies. I'll bet you can eat steak, though. And roast beast. Ask your mum for some...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Mmmm steak...roast beef...

      Hair Ball likey-likes.

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  10. One of my dogs has a lot of allergies, too. He feels your pain, Honey Bear.

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    Replies
    1. I lost all of my hair once from eating Beniful dog food.

      Sir Poops

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  11. Sorry guys, I don't think Honey Bear has any interest in driving.

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  12. Hairball and SPAL would need at least one more dog to help drive a car....

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    Replies
    1. Maybe a Greyhound could reach the peddles.

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  13. Oooh... Honey-Bear has a beautiful coat! What a cutie-pie!

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  14. Wow Honey Bear has been given the perfect name. Her coat is the color of honey.
    Nutschell
    www.thewritingnut.com

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  15. It's fun to imagine what our pets might be saying -- to each other and about us. Are you familiar with YouTube's Henri, the French cat in an existential crisis? If not, go there and check out Henri: Paws de Deux. (Not sure I got that subtitle right, but it's the second of the Henri videos. All three are good -- three last time I checked, but the second one was the best, in my opinion. ... Not sure what my cats think, however.)

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    Replies
    1. I will have to check this out. Thank you.

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Let me know what you think.