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Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Publix, Where Shopping is a Pleasure

Wasn’t going to blog this morning but something came over me. The spirit of Robb Logger, perhaps. The need to blog this bothered me in my sleep. Strange dreams chattered and moved all night in my sleeping world again.

So here we go….

I shop at Publix, one of many chain grocery stores throughout Florida. Many believe such as myself that if you shop there for your groceries you’re pretty well off. Well, at least I’d like to think so.

So let me start again…

I shop at Publix, where shopping is a pleasure. That’s what the commercial says anyway---been brainwashed to think so since I was….that’s along time ago. Can’t say I find grocery shopping pleasurable. It takes me away from my writing. Nothings more pleasurable than writing. Well, maybe….won’t go there(it involves sweetman).

What I do find pleasurable…no wait…what I find funny is when I finally make it to the checkout line and the smiling cashier asks, “Did you find everything you were looking for today?”

It’s like being bonked on the head. I look at the nice cashier-person then my soon to be purchased items. Really? Why ask me that now? Can’t they see I obviously have everything I was looking for? What a silly question.

If I didn’t find everything I was looking for, why am I walking to the checkout line with a full cart?

So I thought, “What would Robb Logger do in a case like this?”

STOP THE CARTS! I’m thinking. Thinking carefully.

Okay. If I were Robb Logger I’d come to the checkout with an empty cart and a list of things.

I would take a picture of the smiling cashier asking me the silly question, “Did you find everything you were looking for today?”

I’d say, “No.” Hand her my list. A list of things that no one would ever be able to find. Things from a cookbook written in Japanese. After, I’d ask, “Can you find these things for me? Can’t find them anywhere?” I would probably take her picture again because by now her face would be twisted trying to figure out what the hell my list says.

I can see it now. I’m sure she’d hand it back to me and excuse herself to go get her manager. This would signal me to leave and leave quickly.

When I arrive home, I’d promptly sit at my computer and write about it. Post the cashier’s pics. Yup. That’s what Robb Logger would do.

I really think we should have those rubber bracelets that say, ‘What Would Robb Logger Do’. How about t-shirts? Wish I could figure out my digital camera. I’ve got some great ideas for one.

Wonder if his next book will be entitled, “What Would Robb Logger Do”. I can see it now. Yup. On the best selling cyber publishing list. Maybe the New York Times best selling list.

What do you all think?

Anyway, this week I’m reading Robb Logger’s “Don’t Go There.” Yup. Shelly’s going to post a review and interview with this famous guy, soon.

You can find him at : http://inspiredbycaffeinenicotine.blogspot.com/

That’s all for now folks!!!

Happy blogging, reading, and writing!!

Shelly

13 comments:

  1. Shelly, very funny blog...I think that's exactly the way Rob would handle that. He'd be taking pictures of the cashier...I can so see that happening.

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  2. @ Jen: Expect it sometime next week.

    @ Beth: I think so, too.

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  3. I would love to be the person standing beind in line.

    Nikki

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  4. Wait Shelly you forgot...you would have to take pictures of the Publix restrooms too! LOL

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  5. That's right, I almost forgot about that one. But, I do have to say the Publix bathroom is subperb. By far one of the cleanest bathrooms in town. Well, maybe my bathroom is since I use it to hide and read in.

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  6. Or bring up two brands of everything and ask their opinion on each - "Excuse me, do you prefer Charmin or Cottonelle? It's hard for me because I love dogs and Cottonelle has those adorable puppies on their packaging... but then Charmin has bears which I also find very cute....". Drive the poor people crazy!

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  7. Oh no, you've let Robb get into your head! :)

    Robb's blog is totally insane ... in a very good way! I loved this post, btw.

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  8. Shelly, doing what Robb would do might not be, uh, safe....

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  9. @ Lauren: I like that idea.

    @EJ: I guess you could say that. He's catching.

    @ Norma: That's why I would leave quickly.

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  10. Robb's contagious... on a level five pathogen level.

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  11. @ William: Quite the viral guy, he is.

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Let me know what you think.