Monday, April 11, 2011

I is for Ice Queen and Icey Blue Mints

Contessa continues to reminisce before Arthur turned her into a vampire.

Brad Pitt vampire

Arthur knit his brows together and opened the Hummer’s door. Gently, he slid me into it’s seat.

“Seriously,” I said, glaring up at him. His eyes averted mine. “What were you doing with that Ice Queen from hell? You had sex with her didn’t you?”

He stooped to one knee, keeping his head down, looking at the ground. “Tessie,” he said. “Girl…women vampires give off a certain scent that normal human males can’t resist even if they want to.”

“That sounds almost as bad as Adam blaming Eve for eating the forbidden fruit in the garden.” I sucked in a gob of air and let out a loud sigh, kicking at the Hummer’s glove box.

He kept his gaze away from mine. Jealousy boiled the blood in my veins.

“The night,” he said. “ she changed me was the night you said you didn’t want to see me anymore. Remember?” Yup. I remembered. Found his whack material in a box in the trunk of his 1979 Trans Am. Thought I’d teach him a lesson and break up with him for a while. The next day they found him missing except his favorite t-shirt and a blood trail in some near-by woods.

“Oh. My. God! Really? You went from whack mags to a vampire-cheerleader-slut-ho-dog! Knew something wasn’t right with that girl.” I crossed my arms in front of my chest, glowering down at him. “Probably gave you crouch critters. Friggin fritters! She did the hole football team in one night! What were you thinking?!”

The moonlight made his hair glow, angelic-like. No way did he look like a blood-sucking-fiend. Whatever guts he came with to eat my friends, left.

A sniffle escaped him. “I’m sorry, Tessie.” His apology didn’t matter. I had more to tell him.

“You know what? I’m still a virgin. Never gave it to anyone. Not even after I was led to believe you died. Maybe you should take me back to my dorm. I’m not sure I want to become a blood-sucker and be with you forever. And when I see that Shelb—

“She’s dead,” Arthur said, peeking at me through his wispy bangs.

I shoved my brows together. “What do you mean she’s dead? Vampires don’t die easily.”

His lip quivered before he said, “Well, I chopped off her head, buried it, and dropped her body into the Atlantic somewhere. That’s what keeps vampires dead forever.”

I shook my head. “What?”

“She made me what I am against my will for one. And two, she was jealous of you for becoming captain of the cheerleading team. She targeted me.” He stood. “And when she found out I was in search of you, she wanted to kill you herself. Couldn’t let that happen. So I killed her.”

My heart softened. “Oh, Arthur.” I reached for his hand and squeezed it.

“I love you. Only you. Please, forgive me.” His yellow eyes embraced mine. Electrical butterflies flew around my stomach.

His words left me speechless. My mouth went dry and my tongue grew pasty. A golf-size lump rolled up into my throat and an overwhelming metal taste seized my palette. Nothing a mint couldn’t fix. My breath must be bad, I thought. Probably residual blood from his lips.

“You okay?” He asked, his thumb stroked my knuckles. Cold and hot shivers traveled up my spine.

I cleared my throat. “Do you have any of those Brach’s Ice Blue Candies? My mouth tastes really gross right now.”

To be continued Wednesday…..


  1. Great take on the vampire story. Look forward to reading more.

  2. They tell me there is a market for vampire stories. Can't see it myself, for my bloodshot eyes.

  3. @ MM: Thanks for stopping by and for the kind compliment.

    @Bob: There's actually a cult of people who gravitate to such. Usually, I write paranormal and ghosty things. Demons and angels, too. Vampire fiction...I wrote between the ages of nine and eleven. I figured I'd play with it for the A-Z challenge but more from the humorous side versus the really bloody-cannibal side. I may be onto something. We'll see...novella series, perhaps?

  4. Couch critters? I never heard them called that.

  5. @ Eve: I meant crotch critters....:) Fart writing this, you know. Very little editing before posting.

  6. Lovin this little sample of writing! Delicious! And the title is so sensory. I'm craving something minty now - perhaps mint chocolate chip ice cream? :)

    Reflections on Writing

  7. @Melissa: Thank you for stopping by. Mint chocolate chip ice cream sounds really good today. The weather is hot here.

  8. Hi, great story..especially as I'm finishing up edits to my vamp ;)

    Dang..why didn't I include some ice-cream in it :p LOL

    following you from A-Z challenge!

  9. I'm not sure what I'm enjoying more, your dialogue or the comments section:

    "I meant 'crotch critters'..." You don't stumble across that in just everyone's comments! :-)

  10. Crotch critters - lol! This was great!

  11. @Ju: Thank you for stopping by. I'll have to check out your blog after I'm done reading comments.

    @E.J.: Probably not...At my Crit group I'm the one with the dark humor.

    @Alison: I'm glad I made you laugh.

  12. Crotch critters? I'm falling about laughing!


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